Creature Feature: Wildlife Jam for the Olfactory Nerves

Yellowstone National Park. In an earlier post I described Wyoming as the kind of place perhaps God either threw together at the last minute, or took to the drawing board with a "what if we tried..." attitude. Yellowstone does nothing to refute that theory.

Where else in the world will you find giant Bison, Elk, Black & Brown Bears roaming freely amongst geysers, bubbling mud pots and sulphur springs?

These are exactly the things we saw. While driving from Cody, WY to Yellowstone we saw a black bear on the side of the road. And if it weren't for Kate's keen eyes we would have missed it. It's not unusual for one to pass cars parked on the side of the road nearly anywhere, but there was something that caught Kate's attention. And off to the side of the road and down a 40 foot ravine was a black bear foraging along side a small river.










Yellowstone is home to Bison










Elk










as well as geysers












a canyon










sulphur springs, which smell pretty bad











and other geothermal curiosities.

Wyoming: The Only State That Is Also a Verb

What are we doing here?

We're Wyom-ing.

Cody, Wyoming, to be precise. Named for it's founder and Kate's distant relative Buffalo Bill Cody. We're still conferring with the judges on that. Ask Dick.

When we look at Wyoming we consider what God was going through when he designed America. New England would have rocky shores and lots of hills and maple and evergreen trees. The Southwest would be arid and flat with cacti. Wyoming, being alphabetically last was treated as such. And God had a whole tray of leftovers. So he stuck them all here, not really sure of what kind of landscape personality he wanted to give it.

Even right now, I'm trying to find a way to explain what I saw today. My brain hurts. Just Google it if you don't know.

But tonight we stay in Cody. Cody is the Rodeo Capital of the World. After a trecherous day of driving through God's Chinese Buffet of an environment we were both pretty wiped out. Upon check-in at tonight's KOA we learned that the campsite offered a shuttle to the Cody Rodeo Nite. And we debated the issue of going or not but only had about an hour and a half to decide whether or not to take the bait. We were so tired that we couldn't foresee ourselves going.

At 7:00, we were on a bus to the rodeo.

It may be the greatest decision we've made this entire trip. If you ever get a chance to see a rodeo, GO. Drink it all in, including the cheap beer. Interact with the natives. Be American.

We both have experienced something like this before, where about a year and a half ago we went to see a Monster Truck Rally in Worcester. A rodeo in Wyoming makes a monster truck rally in Worcester look like a tea party with all of your stuffed animals. And the tea is fake.

There is nothing really I can say about being at a rodeo other than it's exactly what you think it would be like. It's probably the most American thing I've done in a long time.




































And to think, we almost didn't go.

Crazy Horse Rips Off America

General George Armstrong Custer should have finished the job.


There...I said it.


This morning we took a lovely drive through the Black Hills of South Dakota and found ourselves on the path past the Crazy Horse National Memorial. Our guide book states that, although the memorial is incomplete, the face alone stands at 9 stories tall, and when complete will be the largest sculpture in the world. What a sight to see!

We take the left hand turn onto the road that leads up the memorial when something seems terribly wrong. The road leading up to the entrance gate is a one lane road which is decorated with a sign that reads:

NO U TURNS

We immediately had that feeling that your family dog gets when he is promised a playful car ride to the park but suddenly realizes that the trip to the park is really a trip to the vet's office. And there's nothing he can do...

We had no intention of spending a lot of money OR spending a lot of time. We paid $20 for a wrong turn.

Twenty dollars!

And moreover you had to pay MORE money in order to take a bus that will get you closer to the UNFINISHED memorial than the parking lot does.

This is ridiculous! Any other National Memorial wouldn't charge so much for so little! Lincoln Memorial, Mount Rushmore, Crazy Horse.....well, maybe not Crazy Horse. I can still see the Black Hills are still full of jerks.

We stayed long enough to take one picture. Then we got the hell out of there.

Enjoy.

Badlands: A Misleading Name

Unlike the clientele at the Kankakee KOA, the guests of the Sioux Falls, SD KOA were quite pleasant and respectful of those trying to get some rest. These KOA experiences just keep getting better and better. The facilities keep improving the further west we travel. Odds are the trend will come to a halt at some point, but as for now, it's fantastic. The one thing I feel awkward about is free Wi-Fi. This is how I'm able to blog during the trip, and it's at a campground. I never grew up camping but I always viewed it as an experience "roughing it". The first time I truly camped was when I hiked Mt. Washington with Kate and her dad about 5 years ago. She'd been doing that practically all her life so to her it was almost second nature. I have this notion that if you sleep in a tent you're meant to cook your own food, carry out what you carry in, and ultimately shut yourself off from the outside world for a few days, weeks, whatever. But here I sit, typing away, checking the out of town scores, making sure it won't rain tomorrow in Cody, Wyoming or even this coming weekend in Seattle, walking 50 yards to take a hot shower, use a toilet, or even play pinball.

At this point, "roughing it" feels like it should be defined as having to write a rough draft of your blog in Word before you get to your campsite where you can connect to the internet.

But I'm not complaining. And after having the opportunity to shower on a daily basis, neither is Kate or anyone else west of the Mississippi.

Today I truly felt like I arrived in the West. I'm pretty sure it's not a feeling most people get when hanging out in Illinois, Wisconsin or most of Minnesota. But it didn't take long for it to hit me while driving through South Dakota. I can't say I've ever seen rolling landscapes stretch all the way to the horizon. During parts of our drive I could probably go for an hour and count the number of trees that I saw on one hand. It's really astounding to me the amount of "nothing" out here. And I really shouldn't say "nothing". There isn't "nothing" out here. There's alot out here. And there's alot of it. What truly amazes me is the amount of wide open space there is. So much space to put nothing.

Yesterday was the first time I'd traveled over the Mississippi River. I've flown over it before, but I feel like this time it really counts. It's also the first time that I traveled back over the Mississippi River heading East. It's also the first time that I traveled over the Mississippi River heading West twice in one day.

We took a southbound route to get our picture with the "Welcome to Minnesota" sign and had to double back to head in the right direction. Unfortunately that was only one of a few guidance miscues Kate had yesterday. She's a fantastic traveling companion and I love her to death, but the next opportunity I have, we need to take her down to a Verizon store and get her GPS checked out...

Minnesota is long on Route 90. And boring. It's like driving down 495 but there are more trees. As soon as we hit South Dakota, the outlook changed. Driving today was visually stimulating with the different colors of land on either side of the road, not to mention the speed limit is 75 out here. It's almost as if the Mississippi River was intended to be a visual and cultural divider.

Billboards for Rush Hour 3 and the new Gillette Sensor razor have been traded for Casey's Cafe, home of the Perfect Cheeseburger and reminders that abortion kills and that Jesus died for my sins. Town names no longer sound "eastern" in nature, but are now called Pipestone or Deadwood. Radio and television call letters now begin with a "K" instead of a "W". We're definitely not in Massachusetts anymore.

We also traversed another time zone line today, or what Kate and I like to refer as "time travel". A car ride that would normally take 6 hours only takes 5, as far as the clock is concerned. That makes life easier, it gives us time to relax or take in some more sights.

Today we stopped off in Mitchell, SD. Mitchell's claim to fame is the Corn Palace, a building in the center of town of which the outside is constructed from different colors of corn creating a mosaic. Each year features a new mosaic with a special theme chosen for that year. There are also mosaics inside made from corn which depict typical South Dakota scenes.



We continued through South Dakota where it was all flat and unassuming until we reached the crest of a hill on I-90, where we were greeted with what I consider the most outstanding view I've seen this trip yet. It was the valley of the Missouri River in Chamberlain, SD. The river was wider than I could conceive and the cloudless blue sky reflected perfectly like a giant mirror, bisected by speedboat joyriders. The land across the river as we drove was a stark difference from the rolling fields from before. Now there were short little mounds that stretched on, silhouettes of mountains in the distance. We continued onward until we reached the "240 Loop", which takes you through the Badlands of South Dakota.



South Dakota provides the complete opposite of a hayfield which expands to the horizon in the Badlands. And to the contrary, they're quite great.



















































After our trip through the Badlands, the 240 loop drops you off right in Wall, SD; home of Wall Drug - a tourist oasis which dates back to the Great Depression. They still offer free ice water and 5¢ coffee as they did back in the 1930's. But only one word describes Wall Drug: kitsch. And I loved every minute of it. Only in America...

Oh! The Places You'll Go (Midwest Edition)!

So Wednesday we woke up and we took our leave
From Northeast Ohio, from the Land of Cleve
The Red Sox had just taken the first two out of four
But the Indians were hoping to settle the score
I could tell you about Beckett, Tavarez and more
But that’s not what this internet blog site is for…


Down Route 71 our rubber did burn
But after Columbus we took a left turn
On purpose! Don’t worry! Now don’t get irate,
It’s a town called Lancaster in this four-lettered state.

Right into this town, our tires were squealing
Where we drove up to a house on a street called East Wheeling
We made a short visit with Bertha, my aunt
But other business was ahead, so read on if you want.


My great-grandfather was once the mayor of this town

So to city hall Kate and I headed right down
To see what kind of weight my last name could throw ‘round
We were greeted quite welcomely, without a frown.

My grandfather and uncles, way back in the day
Had graffiti’ed the walls in an old fashioned way
So we went to take pictures up in the bell tower
Of the names of Paul, Ralph, and Frederick Sexauer.



As fun as that was, we had much more to go
On the western half side of O-H-I-O.
Across the south route, our engine did hum
To Middletown, Ohio, where my mom’s side is from.

Cousin Pat was our hostess, and few things does she lack,
She’s as quick as a pistol and sharp as a tack.
She treated us to dinner (O’Charley’s was the fare)
Like a Ground Round, but ain’t found near Boston anywhere.

We visited Pat’s friend, Mary, before our day was done,
I hadn’t seen her since nineteen ninety one.
After this much travel normal people would retire to their beds,
But Kate and I went to see the Brewers play the Reds.



Cincinnati’s Great American Ballpark is quite a sight to see,
Though it will always be Riverfront Stadium to me.
But it pains me to say this, their fans are so boring,
The guy sitting next to us was practically snoring.
There was no excitement, they cheer when they’re told,
Those goofy foul ball sound effects began to get old.
Despite all of this, it was free bobble-head night!
Free Frank Robinson bobble? I’ll take it, alright!


The Reds won and that’s because we thought we’d share
Some good luck, ‘cause there were two Red Sox fans there.
We went back to Pat’s, only to wake up in the morn,
So we could drive to Chicago through the Hoosier State corn.

We stopped at Tim Horton’s for Kate’s coffee craze,
Then proceeded to drive HOURS through long rows of maize.
If you’ve never driven through this country’s section,
It’s all soybeans and cornstalks in either direction.

At long last we made it at the end of the day,
To our stop for two nights, good ol’ camp KOA.
There’s no finer place to stay, be you girl or a boy,
Then the KOA camp in Kankakee, Illinois.


We woke up Friday morning, it started to rain,
But no matter! We drove ourselves out to the train.
So read on, our dear readers, for we’re about to tell
Our tale of how we did Chicago, I-L.


Can Chicago be done in one day? It might not be pretty,
But the Sexauer’s handled one day in the Windy City.
So with no real agenda we followed our ears,
To ascend a well-known tower, the people call “Sears”.


From 103 floors you can see quite a lot,
Most of it’s pretty, some of it’s not.


We had quite enough so we headed back down,
Where we traveled on foot to the east side of town.


We traveled by foot to a one “Gino’s East”,
To the home of the original deep dish pizza feast.
Couple beers, no beers, and a piece of Chicago’s pie,
Kate’s one lucky girl, Matt’s one lucky guy!


To Wrigley Field Kate and I both took a ride,
On the “L” to Addison Street, on Chicago’s north side.
Such a great piece of history, a fantastic landmark,
A very old stadium, second to Fenway Park.



Back on the “L” where we rode for a while,
And we got off and walked the “Magnificent Mile”.
It’s like New York’s Fifth Avenue and it’s not real hard,
To spend and spend, maxing out your credit card.

Just one more thing to do to round out our day,
Go down to the south side to see the White Sox play.
“Four games in five days!” Is that what you say?
It’s cheaper than Fenway, and that makes it okay!

U.S. Cellular Field is just kind of “blah”,
But the fans are better than the Reds fans we saw.
The two of us stayed until the seventh inning,
And that’s fine because the White Sox ended up winning.


At the end of the game, fireworks filled the air,
Again, ‘cause there were two Red Sox fans there.

Chicago’s a wicked cool town, I must say,
I wish we had a little bit more time to stay.
From Jake, Elwood, Ditka, and the late Harry Caray,
And to think it almost burned down by a provider of dairy.

Well Wisconsin, Minnesota, there’s not much to see,
There’s just one thing to do, to save your sanity,
Just one thing to do, for passing the time,
And that’s update your weblog, by making it rhyme.

Cleveland....rocks?

Today was a very special day. July 24th holds a dear place in our hearts. Especially that day back in 2004.

It's also the day that Kate and I were married. What a day.

So today we got up and walked the 15 minute walk to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. And what before our eyes but the world's largest rubber stamp! Saints be praised! And on July 24th of all days. Kate really is the luckiest girl in the world.

And from there we walked past Cleveland Browns Stadium to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. It has alot of guitars in it. Alot of guitars and alot of costumes. Red Sox fans too. The place was packed and my patience was tried. The museum was fun but there were only so many jump suits, polyester vests, and cracked acoustic guitars I could handle.
Cameras weren't allowed beyond a point (which was most of the hall, except for my third example) but there were three things that really impressed me. One was the Michael Jackson wardrobe collection. The sparkly glove, the Billie Jean video outfit, even the Grammy Award show sequined military jacket. The second was their Beatles collection, including George Harrison's Rickenbacker, John Lennon's Sgt. Pepper Jacket and hand written lyrics to Lucy in the Sky and In My Life. And the third, for me of course, were the 1994 New Years Eve props used at the Boston Garden by Phish.

























Okay, I've seen enough.
















Act Two: Game Time!

We showed up at 4:30 for batting practice. Couple beers, no beers, and DOLLAR HOT DOG NIGHT!!! What a way to spend a wedding anniversary. Before the game you could text message the Cleveland Indians and have your message displayed on the giant scoreboard. Our front row seats behind the Sox dugout were fantastic, plus Daisuke, Okajima and Papelbon pitched a 4-hit 1-0 shut out gem (but WHY can't Daisuke ever get decent run support??!!).
Jacobs Field is a beautiful park and reminds me alot of Camden Yards. Cleveland is also a lovely city and everyone is very friendly. Go, if you ever have the chance.

Also, Tina Cervasio smiled and waved at me.

Does anyone know the fastest way out of Erie, PA?

As part of our "Road Trip Guidelines", Matt and I have decided not to visit any chain restaurants that are available to us in New England. Another guideline we have is that we will try, if time permits, to travel on those roads less traveled: those two lane roads through Americana.

Yesterday after our brief stop in Buffalo (and yes Denise, it does sound like this trip is all about food, doesn't it?) we ventured off "the 90" and traveled on the lesser route 20 through Pennsylavania. It began as a nice drive with slower speed limits through wine country, and we were surrounded by grapevines. Occassionally we would pass through those small towns that have a downtown mainly consisiting of a post office, American Legion or other towny bar, consignment shop and some sort of car repair garage. It was quite nice to take our time on our way to Cleveland, and we enjoyed the scenery and conversation.

That is, until we hit Erie, Pennsylvania.

We traveled in silence for a while, because I get sick of the iPod and like to have quiet for a while. I looked at Matt after about an hour into Erie and said, "You know what? I'm not scared, but Erie is kind of a dump". And Matt agreed. It was like driving through Lawrence, or the trashy sections of Lowell. Nothing to look at except old run down houses, Dollar General Stores, and consignment shops. Plus, it was the beginning of rush hour, so it kind of took forever. Ugh. We finally were out of there around 3:30. I hope you never have to travel through Erie, ever.

So, with the help of "phone", or our gps which totally kicks ass, we make it to our hotel in Cleveland by around five-ish.

Now, we had no idea what to do once we got here. So, we decided to walk the two blocks to Jacob's Field and see if there were any seats open to the Sox vs. Indians game. We thought that it would be sold out; so when we walked up to the ticket window and asked for tickets, the woman said "well, let me see what is open"....I then said, "we'll take the cheapest seats available", and she said "we have plenty of those!" So we had $7 seats for last night's game with John Lester pitching his first game since last summer...and he kicked ass. I love being a Red Sox fan! It was a beautiful evening! Matt will tell you about our happy anniversary which was today! But I'll let you know that Cleveland fans are awesome, and they let you text stuff on their jumbo-tron during the game....you don't have to pay a hundred bucks to wish someone a happy birthday or anniversary like you do at Fenway!